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Thanksgiving Day Rules to live by

Look, no one enjoys spending a day with in-laws and random folks who obviously don’t know as much about sports as you do.  It makes for a long pre and post dinner conversation.  I used to have to listen to a Ohio State fan from Memphis who still thinks the Big 10 is better than the SEC.  Thankfully he got divorced out of the fam.  So here are a few rules to get you through the day.

  • First and foremost, take off your school colored glasses.  I have to take my Crimson glasses off first thing.
  • if you find yourself in a bind pull the “take a nap after dinner” trick.  It gets you out of some conversations.
  • Find the youngest non-talking person there and take them for a stroll in the stroller.
  • When people start really getting to ya, continue to stuff your face with desserts and finger foods.  Just nod your head and ignore all the B.S. being slung out.
  • Last resort is to go into a violent rage and throw the table across the room while everyone is sitting on it.  This should end the party and you can enjoy your day in peace.
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